Disclaimer: a post in which I ponder my self and career
It’s summertime – things slow way down on college campuses. At least, they seem to, even when we have all the projects and planning to do for the next school year. [Also, as I write this, it’s only felt like summer for a few days here in central Illinois.]
A recent post by Jessica Olin at Letters to a Young Librarian addressed Preventing Librarian Burnout. My reading eyes tend to see information about Meditation pretty often, so it’s something that is always there, somewhere in the background. Actually meditating, or even taking some time, well… we all fall of the wagon, right?
So I left my office. I left the library building. I sat on a bench – with this as my view
and thought…about things…about work.
(By the way, there are many types of Meditation and Mindfulness that point to ’emptying’ one’s mind. I took a slightly different turn by trying to focus on one thing instead of several things.)
And here’s what I found after 10 minutes or so of contemplation:
I am not very excited about my current work.
Maybe it’s the projects that seem to be slight variations on the same thing – no real creative effort.
Maybe it’s part 2 of ‘spring fever’ – it was beautiful outside and I didn’t really want to be behind a computer screen.
Maybe it’s because the best part of my day is coming home to a little person that absolutely lights up every.single.time. And since it’s just past the season of convocations and the cliche that’s bandied about quite often of finding your passion and doing that: My passion right now is this little man
And there’s another little one coming soon (in July – this time a girl).
Sharing life with a toddler in which you can see the actual learning taking place on a daily basis is amazing. Preparing for and anticipating the arrival of another baby is pretty exciting, too.
Thinking about projects to support learning in young adults (first year college students), who I haven’t met, is not quite as amazing.
This is a slightly strange and uncomfortable place to be in – this transition from a brand new librarian to not brand new, from being focused on the job so intently to working under uncertainty within programmatic changes (my position is changing and no one is quite sure what it will look like on a day-to-day basis).
Getting back to the blog referenced at the top (Preventing Librarian Burnout) – I’m not the only one with this experience. This is what we do, right? We work work work. We do the thing. Then the next thing.
I guess, if I could end with questions for possible feedback, especially from those who have been doing this a while:
Do you lose the excitement? How often?
How do you personally rekindle the excitement?